Possibly one of the most feared and anxiety-inducing times is college graduation. College was potentially the best time of your life thus far. While sometimes stressful, it was crazy fun, you lived with your best friends, and had full authority over your life. You’ve spent your whole life up until now having the general structure and direction of your life decided for you. And all of a sudden that framework, and that perfect college life, is gone, and YOU have to decide what’s next alone. For most people, life after college is not something they look forward to, but it should be! If you are graduating college soon, start planning ahead in these areas to make post grad life the best it can be.
The four areas you need to figure out to create you dream life after college are getting a job (that you more or less like), having friends/a community, hobbies/enjoyment, and purpose. Getting your life together will not be fast or super easy, but by planning how you will feel fulfilled in these areas will help put you on the path to living the 20s of your dreams. Where are you living? How are you making money? What do you do for fun, and who do you do these things with? Unfortunately, your 20s are not for glamour, but for grinding. Make a plan for how to make life fun after college, then steps of how to get to that ideal 20s life.
Getting a job
This is the first thing people tend to start planning or thinking about when they force themselves to think about life after college. For some people, this is easy. If you’ve had summer internships that went well, you might already have a job offer. Others may have an idea of what they want to do and a few connections that might help. Some people just have no idea! To make your life after college ideal, start your job search early! Unfortunately, this is one of the four areas that is more or less out of your control.
If you have a job going into senior year, you’re all set in this category! Unfortunately, that is not most people. Bigger companies tend to start hiring earlier than most, so if you’re looking for a job at a name brand, you should be on the lookout for jobs in August or September before/when you go back for the semester. A lot of people start applying at the beginning of the second semester, which gives them enough time to find a job before graduation.
If you aren’t sure what you want to do, you have some decisions to make. Do you want to get a corporate job that you might or might not hate? Or, do you want to do some soul searching for the summer before applying during the September hiring rush? I personally think those are the two paths most people who aren’t sure what they want to do take. This of course is heavily impacted by if you have the ability to move back home or not.
Should you take a gap year?
A counter idea is to take a gap year if you really aren’t sure what you want, or if you want to take time to travel before settling into the working world. I am thankful I have an idea of what I want to do in my life, but I went to school during COVID and didn’t get the chance to study abroad. I took the year post grad to live in Spain and teach English using a program called NALCAP. If traveling is something you’re interested in, you should check out this post as well that goes through ways you can long term travel for relatively low cost!
the job market
Unfortunately, this is not a great time to be looking for a job (as I am writing this in September of 2024). I graduated in 2023, and I know people who graduated all throughout COVID who are having trouble finding full time jobs. I know the jobs number came out recently, and it was low. Lots of companies have been having layoffs and not hiring as many people as they normally would. This is a reality of the times, and remember that you can’t take it personally! It doesn’t mean anything about who you are. If you worked your butt off looking for jobs, applying, and interviewing, then know you are doing the best you can and that’s enough. You will get a job eventually. Remember you’d probably prefer waiting a little for a job you’d enjoy rather than getting a job you hate.
This is a snippet of what my life looked while in Spain! I made lifelong friends and got to travel all over Europe. If you are looking to do something fun and excited after college, I highly recommend NALCAP! I lived in Ibiza for nine months and loved it! I wrote about my experience here if it’s something you’d want to know more about.
Having friends and/or a community
One of the most difficult parts of life after college is in the friends department. You just went from living with or near your best friends to potentially living in a different city or state. Some people are lucky and get to move out with their friends, but many people don’t! Lots of people either move back home for a bit or to a new place where they know no one.
After college, you figure out who your true friends are. Some people you’ll keep up with like nothing has changed, but others you might not hear from very often. Make a plan of how you are going to stay in touch with your friends and find a time to see each other in person. It will only get more difficult to hang out with your college friends as time goes on and you get busier, so start early and make it a habit!
Making new friends is the harder part and probably more realistic. If you are living at home, at least you have your parents and potentially friends from your hometown to spend time with. If you’re in a new city, you’ll have a lot less people. Regardless, you’ll probably want a few more people to hang out with. One of the easiest ways is to download an app like Bumble BFF. I’ve personally found apps difficult to really connect with others with, but I know they’ve worked for some people. I’m actually currently developing an app solely focused on helping people build friendships after college or a big move, so once that’s live I’ll post more about it!
How to find friends
The best way to make new friends is to join a group of some kind! This will be reiterated in the next part, but you need to put yourself out there and try something new if you want to find new people. Do you enjoy volunteering? Find an organization to volunteer at regularly or even at your local library. Do you want to pick up a new hobby? Find out what kind of classes are around you to take and meet others with similar interests. Do you like meeting new people? See if there is a tennis or sports league you’d want to try out or a junior club.
To be a part of a community, you have to join one! Look at the things you like to do and find a way to do them with others. That way, you’ll have activities and more of a social life, while also feeling more fulfilled by doing something you like.
I’m currently taking a seven week intro to pottery class near me! While I haven’t made any BFFs yet, it’s nice to have people I’m friendly with to chat with! Being home now, I’m able to hang out with my cousins more. We’re super close and love to do things together, which was more difficult when I was in Spain. Recently we explore an outdoor bookstore shown on the left. I thought it was adorable and such a fun idea of a business!
Hobbies / Interests
I think one of the first things that hit me during my post grad life was a lack of activities on my calendar. I’m the type of person to not need to hang out with my friends everyday, but not having my college friends, classes or clubs left me wondering what to do with my time. I spend hours searching lists of hobbies on Pinterest trying to curate the perfect few into my life and it has made such a difference. As I mentioned before, I go to a pottery class every week. On top of that, I am teaching myself Italian, practicing my photography, writing on this blog, and going on long distance walks. Putting these on my schedule and treating them as if they were important business meetings, it’s time I block out for myself to be a more interesting person.
Nothing is worse than the post grad person who does nothing but work and complains about their life. I’m a firm believer that you are to blame if your life is boring. If there is something you want to do, you should do it! I have a whole post about how to do things alone and become your own BFF and also about how to romanticize your fall. Fill your life with things that interest you and you will in turn become interesting!
Getting started
If there are a few hobbies you are already interested in and want to start, you should pick a few and see what sticks. Or you can be like me and scroll online to find inspiration. Tik Tok knows what I like a little too much. I’ve started seeing videos about needlepoint and now I want to try it! Pick one or two hobbies to test out for a few months to see if it’s something you like and want to continue. Having things that you look forward to, help you have more social connection, and make life more exciting post grad.
Here are a few of my favorite photos I’ve taken recently.
Purpose / Sense of Direction
Some people have known since they left the womb their purpose. That they’re supposed to be a doctor or a painter etc. For most people though, I think your purpose or what you’re meant to do is something you figure out piece by piece, day by day. I’ve figured out that I want to do things that make me happy and make a difference in the world. That is easy enough to incorporate everyday! I always try to treat people with kindness and make their lives a bit easier or happier. And I want everyday to be interesting and fun, so I fill my days with things that I enjoy like my many hobbies, my friends, and my family.
So if you know what you want to do or have no idea at all, I think the most important purpose you can pursue is thinking of what legacy you want to leave – what do you want people to remember you by? Making others think harder and more critically? Making others laugh easier and more often? Learning more and more everyday? Taking care of others? Express your creativity? Did things that made you happy?
We make our purpose seem like it has to be this big life altering thing, when it really boils down to what kind of person you were and if we added all of the days you lived and looked at the day you averaged, what did you do? While maybe you want a great career, and you do spend most of your life working, I think we should aim to live lives that authentically embody our values. You should want to have lived a life that means something to you, that makes sense to you.
Conclusion
Life after college will look different to and for everyone. Some people will move to a new city for their adult job and look to an outside viewer like they are living their dream 20s life. Other people will move home, live with their parents, and grind their hearts out. Some people will move to a new city, know no one, and hate it for a time. Our 20s are not linear and will look completely different.
If you’re living your post grad life right now and not loving it, check out this post about changes you can make it make it suck less<3
Remember that most people’s real day to day lives are not what they appear to be on social media. It’s not a race or a competition. You aren’t doing worse just because someone else is doing well. Your 20s will be full of twists and turns you could never guess as you right now. Just focus on building your life to be something that you enjoy, and you will figure it out!
I’m sending good vibes your way. Don’t forget that we got this!
XOXO,
Emily
